unbreakable-dreams

2009-07-09T01:46:00.000-07:00

i miss the times.
the movies,
the lan,
the dinner,
the slacking,
the mahjong,
east coast park.
i miss you.

2009-06-13T23:47:00.000-07:00

wed going stjames powerhouse for birthday celebration!
10pm!
hope to see you dere(:

2009-06-09T04:52:00.000-07:00

my birthday around the corner(:

*hint hint*

hahaha.
i wanna celebrate wif my frens! :D
i wanna celebrate wif cousins and sister(:
i wanna celebrate wif mummy.
i wanna a birthday cake(:
i wanna a new phone, LG Renoir or Arena(:
i wanna a digital camera!
i wanna a new bag!
i wanna money!
i wanna more clothes, dresses(:

doubt i would get much presents though.
economy crisis! hahaha.
but its the thoughts dat counts rite? (:

more than anything, i wan him to celebrate wif me even if it means getting no presents at all.
i wouldnt mind.
i would exchange everyting jus for him to be here ='(

2009-06-08T08:30:00.000-07:00

sometimes i think, am i a gd fren?
most of the time the ans is no.

cause im bad-tempered.
sometimes i even forgot bout their birthdays:(
i can be frens wif ppl.
but never those very close type.
those best frens are lyk only 1 or 2?

everytime i see other ppl's birthday lyk so fun,
so many ppl clelebrate wif them.
kinda makes me wonder, where are my frens?
this year hopefully will be different.
cause afterall its the 18th birthday.
aint it suppose to be special?
i defintely hope so.

my clique says we gonna go for dinner(:
and im so looking forward to it(:
even if no presents, their presence there is alr a gift(:
cause they spent a year of ups and downs wif me.
and especially jess(:
i love you girls(:
sorry bout my temper sometimes,
but i really wish we can spend more time outside of sch(:

2009-06-02T08:55:00.000-07:00

can neva imagine what my life would be now without my beloved zayden(:
it's always a pleasure coming home knowing that there's someone happy that u're back.
greets you when u come home after a hard day out.
and when you even though the whole world is against you, there is someone always there no matter what.
and that is wat dogs are for.
they are loyal and they love you for who u are.

he neva fail to put a smile on my face with his antics.
he may be naughty bitting stuff and all.
bt sometimes its really funny!
see the blue patch on the photo?
found on him one morning.
and we straight away know he has been bitting a pen the night before.
ths explains the stain.

his toy and bed from ikea!
he loves the ball.
always bitting it around and wanting us to play tug-o-war wif him(:

when im upset, he will be there.

at least he gives me abit of comfort and warmth when my life is at its lowest.

cant imagine the day when he will no longer be dere for me.

i will be devastated :(

2009-05-20T04:39:00.000-07:00

i was watching the school nationals
and i saw netball!
omg. how i miss netball :(
really.
the adrenaline rush just before every match and when u're shooting.
i wanna be back in netball :(

2009-05-19T16:26:00.000-07:00

im jus feeling fucking depressed.
and it definitely has nth to with with pms cause it ended last week.

sigh. i need a counsellor.
i need someone to talk to.
i need to talk to him

i doubt any amount of chocs is gonna work.
it supposedly make u happy.

2009-05-07T11:52:00.000-07:00

long mrt rides at night can be fun too(:

school today was a killer! 9-9! 12 hrs in nyp!
gosh, can u imagine that?

anw, i skip the first half and went only at 2.

finally had a chance to really talk wif jess and its so much fun!(:
after we finish sch we took train tgt and she accompany me a the way to clarke quay(:
we seem to be able to talk abt everything and anything.
she's such a busy woman, we hardly have the time to talk.
so its kinda gd once in awhile to keep each other updated wif our lives(:

2009-04-27T07:47:00.000-07:00

i really dunno.
sometimes i'll be so brave,
sometimes i choose to hide in my shell and cry.
cry for my stupidity, cry for my fate, cry for my lost love.
was it even mine in the first place? guess not.

i cant stop the tears,
nor the jealousy i feel.
i try to believe, but deep down we both noe its all lies.
our relationship was built on lies.
and continue to live on in lies.
u choose to lie, i choose to believe.
why so? cause i dun wanna hurt.

im not brave lyk any other girls to do a clean break once and for all.
im not dat kind.
at least not towards u.

everytime i look forward to our meeting.
yet i'll be face wif disappointment once again.

i noe you didnt do ur visa today.
u went to meet someone else.
isnt it true.
you didnt reply msg and u reach home late.
dun tell me u out wif ur dad till so late.
u lied. didnt you?

everytime i got drunk you came to my mind.
somebody jus has to say a litte something to trigger the tears.
and it will start flowing lyk a river.

i hate to be so weak.
to appear weak to other ppl.
its not wat i wan.
i used to be the brave one.

2009-04-18T13:10:00.001-07:00

whee~ im blogging from work!!
sigh, i miss him.
i miss the hugs, the kisses.
yet it can nv be the same again.
where are you when i needed you the most?
hugging some other girls?
i guess so.
i really really miss you.
the old you.

2009-04-16T21:12:00.000-07:00

im so tired of trying and hurting.
i tried to make u turn back.
but it doesnt works.

when we out together, does it kill you not to reply 1 or 2 smses?
does it kill you not to pick up the call.
i guess it does, if not she or they will come after you?

fuck care lah.
do you even care about my feelings when u pick up the call,
talk until so sweet and nice.
reply sms and smiling at the same time.
even talk on msn when im around.

in the past, you wouldn't do that.
this jus shows how much i mean to you.
i was neva someone special to you.
neva someone important to you.
jus a spare tire.

2009-04-14T12:09:00.000-07:00

i was browsing through 2007 yearbook.
i saw the netball photos dat we took 2 years ago.
much memories flooded back.

i miss netball!
netball in gess was much much better than nyp.
there may be poitics too.
but we all strive hard as a team.

i miss them.
the time when we play together, train together, laugh together.
its so much fun!

i miss secondary sch too.
funny classmates, outings after school.
now? life is so boring.
poly life is so different from wat i thought.

once again, poly life gonna start soon.
wonder if i can handle it?
timetabe is crazy, so fully pack =/
almost everyday is morning till late afternoon :(

2009-04-09T21:01:00.000-07:00

I HATE ALCOHOL!!

I SWEAR!!

2009-03-30T12:55:00.000-07:00

yay!!!!!
finally gt my new sch bag!!! :D
nice?! :D
$89.90 eh!!!
omg~ faint~

gifts from all my customers(:
this guy send flowers to me when im working!
sweet rite!! (:
pretty flowers(:

one of my regular customer bought me this hello kitty!!
so cute hor! i choose de(:

zayden wanna attack my hello kitty when i'm trying to take photos! =/
he attacked it the day before.
tearing the bag! =/

the keychain will have flashes of light when press!!!
my customer buy for me oso(:
this smal keychain costs $10 lor!!!
zayden oso aiming it cause it flashes!

my korkor came down support me and bought this for me!
couple doggie!!
look at zayden again -.-
keep on aiming my toys!
so naughty!
even snatch from me k!!!! =/

my most handsome boy(:
love him deep deep! :D

taken quite long ago.

my darling watching tv leh!

so smart rite(:

haha. no lah.

cause gt dog bark in the show.

hahah.

2009-03-29T07:18:00.000-07:00

someone who cares for me.
takes great care of me.
shower me wif concern.

send me home when im drunk lyk an idiot.
lend me a shoulder to cry on.
cheer me up when things are bad.
take care of me when im sick.

i appreciate everything he has ever done for me.
but i dunno why i cant do the same.

why isnt it him, but other guy.
that appreciates me and treat me lyk a princess.

2009-03-27T03:39:00.000-07:00

so rough update of wat i've been doing for the past weeks,
clubbing and pubbing.
basically you can either spot me at boat quay or clarke quay everyday!
and most of the time im drunk!
my liver gonna spoil very very soon.............
:(

2009-03-10T04:57:00.000-07:00

neva thought working in that place would be so hard!

anw have been busy for the past few days!
firstly, friday was trac's birthday chalet.
stayed over till next morning.
lots of dramas! gosh!
and i wasnt drunk! :D
dun have the photos.
wanna see more go to noelle's blog(:

then sunday night was marcus birthday.
celebrated at boat quay, amber21.
didnt drink much oso.
was kinda sick.
down wif bad flu :(
went home at around 4.30am.
pictures please go to noelle's blog(:

2009-03-05T07:22:00.000-08:00

powerhouse ytd was FUN!!! :D
saw suppose to meet my fren and go but he was lyk damn freaking late!
so nv meet him in the end.
saw sebas they all inside(:
trac, marcus & falfen was dere too(:

drink and dance and drink and dance! :D
super pack inside.
but at least there's crowd! (:

drink quite abit cause they open 2 bottles of henessy.
plus, my own jug of vodka orange(:
which expains why im DRUNK!!
and noelle, sweet have to take care of me again=/
sorry and thanks sweet(:
i realised im ultra friendly when im drunk(:
so if u wanna make frens wif me, come to me when im drunk.
hahahah.
no matter whether guy or girl:D

dunno how come when we leave only left trac and falfen.
they send me home first. and sweet followed me up(:
powerhouse again next week alright! :D

i lost one of my favourite earstud! :(
cant find the exact one anymore :(
dunno how i lost it too.
sweet lost her 2 hairbands!

2009-02-27T11:07:00.000-08:00

i swear im gonna lose some fats.
(alot actually) =/

then i can go clubbing/suntanning and show off my navel piercing! :D
hahahaha.
jus joking.
ppl would get so turn off jus by looking at my fats! :(

my plan, eat very very little.
and if i can find ppl to exercise wif me?
i wanna go london weight management!!!!!!!!

2009-02-26T08:24:00.000-08:00

will try to blog bout the class chalet soon!
*if i get the mood to start* :D

met up wif sweet today!
lyk after about 1 week?
miss her much!
and we finally get our navel piercing done! :D
i thought it would be painful.
but the truth is, it doesnt hurt that bad.
very bearable(:

hope you're not too gross out by my fats after seeing this(:

went to watch marley and me at 9 plus.
before movie starts, sweet came over to my hse(:
i still prefer the book to the movie.
the book is nicer.
much more detail.
shoud read it but should oso watch the movie!
i rate it 7.5/10
cause im someone who loves to watch dog shows and who loves dog(:

2009-02-22T11:33:00.000-08:00

if you been through wat i went through,
you wont wanna rush into a relationship now.
so yea, i need more time.
and if u dun wanna wait, nth i can say or do.
im jus not ready.

i enjoyed spending time wif you.
talking to u and u caring for me.
but the thing is im jus not ready=/

but i dun wan u to leave too.
sigh.

2009-02-17T08:06:00.000-08:00

i cant wait for exams to finish!
not mine, but sweet and darling's!
cause thier ending later =/

went studyign with sweet on sun and mon.
went to liang court on sun.
and tiong on mon.

studied at the hongkong cafe at liang court.
the carrot cake is nice! :D

mine, cripsy garlic ribs noodle(:

SWEET! :D

she is so hardworking. haha.

sweet bought me the bun to cheer me up.

so sweet of her rite(:

and the bun is sooooo cute!

we were taking pictures most of the time! haha.

got many things planned to do,

after her exam.

we're gonna do naval piercing!!! :D

i wanna do tatto too.

but not sure.

sweet dun let me do tongue piercing!!!!!!!!

RAWRS!

2009-02-12T09:18:00.000-08:00

Sweet! (Noelle)

nothing i say can shows how grateful i am for yor company(:
thanks alot for lending me your shoulder(:
seriously, i woudnt noe wat to do if u werent dere ytd.
you're always so nice and warm!
its almost lyk i can go find you anytime if i have any problems! :D
thanks yea, regret not knowing you earlier(:

Darling! (Sheeny)

darling! its amazing how we can click together because i neva thought we would be that close(:
im really happy to have you as my fren(:
you're jus lyk noelle, always dere for me.
i noe even if i have no love, i will still have u 2 dere to comfort me and tell me its alright.
thanks of listening to all my whines and cries.
lending me a shoulder too when i need someone to cry on.
or being on the phone wif me and listening to me crying.
it may not seem lyk alot.
but you did ALOT for me in this short period of time(:
thanks for showing me how true frens should be.
i wan us to be best frens!
forever ok! :D
love you darling!
meet up soon.
im missing you!

2009-02-10T05:21:00.000-08:00

只剩下鋼琴陪我站在這裡
zhi sheng xia gang qin pei wo zhan zai zhe li
There's only the piano left to stand here with me

夢想中屬於我們的婚禮
meng xiang zhong, shu yu wo men de hun li
The marriage between us that I've always dreamt of

卻成了單人結婚進行曲
que cheng le, dan ren jie hun jin xing qu
Has become the tune of someone walking down the aisle alone

在這場愛情角力的拔河裡愛我還是愛你
zai zhe chang ai qing jiao li de ba he li, ai wo hai shi ai ni
In this love tug-of-war, to love me or to love you

你選擇了自己
ni xuan zhe le zi ji
You chose yourself

撒嬌的可愛的女人的愛哭的
sa jiao de, ke ai de, nv ren de, ai ku de
Poutingly, Cutely, Girlishly, Loving to cry

照片裡曾經的都是你喜歡的
zhao pian li, ceng jing de dou shi ni xi huan de
All the photos contains memories that you like

如今我還在原地你卻走回你的記憶
ru jin wo hai zai yuan di, ni que zou hui ni de ji
Till today I'm still at the starting point, but you have already walked back into your memories

你說我愛你太多就快要把你淹沒
ni shuo wo ai ni tai duo, jiu kuai yao ba ni yan mo
You said I loved you too much, so much so that it's drowning you

你害怕幸福短暫一秒就崩落
ni hai pa xing fu duan zhan yi miao jiu peng luo
You're scared that happiness will ebb after only a second

分開是一種解脫　讓你好好的想過
fen kai shi yi zhong jie tuo, rang ni hao hao de xiang guo
Breaking up is a form of relief; it allows you to think through carefully

我想要的那片天空　你是不是能夠給我
wo xiang yao de na pian tian kong, ni shi bu shi neng gou gei wo
Can you give me that life that I want

你說我給你太多卻不能給我什麼n
i shuo wo gei ni tai duo, que bu neng gei wo shen me
You said I gave you too much, that you couldn't give me anything

分不清激情承諾永恆或迷惑
fen bu qing ji qing cheng nuo yong heng huo mi huo
Can't tell between fervour, promises, eternity or temptation

愛情是一道傷口
ai qing shi yi dao shang kou
Love is like a wound

我們各自苦痛
wo men ge zi ku tong
Let's endure the pain ourselves

什麼是我最后溫柔
shen me shi wo zui hou wen rou
What is my final act of gentleness

是因為我太愛你
shi yin wei wo tai ai ni
Is because I love you too much

只剩下鋼琴陪我站在這裡
zhi sheng xia gang qin pei wo zhan zai zhe li
There's only the piano left to stand here with me

夢想中屬於我們的婚禮
meng xiang zhong, shu xu wo men de hun li
The marriage between us that I've always dreamt of

安靜了在我整夜的夢裡
an jing le, zai wo zheng ye de meng li
Has been silenced in my night-long dream

我知道相愛原本就不容易
wo zhi dao xiang ai yuan ben jiu bu rong yi
I know that mutual love is not easy from the start

愛不是一加一
ai bu shi yi jia yi
Love is not just one plus one

努力就有結局
nu li jiu you jie ju
You won't always get results even if you work hard

撒嬌的可愛的迷人的愛哭的
sa jiao de, ke ai de, mi ren de, ai ku de
Poutingly, Cutely, Girlishly, Loving to cry

照片裡曾經的都是愛著你的
zhao pian li, ceng jing de dou shi ai zhe ni de
From all the photos we've taken it can be seen how much I once loved you

臉頰的淚還溫熱卻沒有人握我的手
nian jia de lei hai wen re, que mei you ren wo wo de shou
The tears on my cheeks are still warm, yet there's no one holding my hand

a very nice song by S.H.E.
title is an jing le.
got the lyrics off some blogger.
some of the words aint right so pardon me!
anw, go search the song in youutube.
bet you'll love it lyk i do.
cause its sounds so similiar to my life.

2009-02-08T23:46:00.001-08:00

this time, the pain is even worse.
much much worse.

i told myself not to be serious.
jus take it lightly.
but you, make me believe once again that u're true.
seriously, who am i kidding but myselfthat u'll leave again.

i shouldnt have hope,
i shouldnt have trust,
i shouldnt have love.

if all this are obstacles god put me through,
then please, its enough.
once was bad enough, and now?
the2nd time.
it feels much worse.
so much more terribe than u can imagine.

leaving me because its the best for me?
then in the first place, why come back?

i hate myself.
i made this happen.
im jus so weak.
so fragile.
whenever i think of days without you.
wat am i suppose to do to get myself out of this?

tears nv stops flowing.
body nv stops longing.
mind nv stops thinking.
heart nv stops aching.

2009-02-07T22:10:00.000-08:00

i guess things whihc are not meant to be.
no matter how much effort you put in, it will still end up the same.

i thought i had grown stronger after being through it once.
but no, i still the same.
weak as always when im around you.

i thought you had changed too.
but im jus kidding myself.
at the start, mayb you're nicer.

but i know you'll get sick of me soon.
so i might as well leave early.
before you start hating me.

2009-01-29T01:06:00.000-08:00

finally meet up wif ariza!!!
after so so long =/

met her first then we went to do my sim card.
hamidah came later.
then went to repair phone and had dinner at ramen ten!!
my favourite! (:

hamidah and me(:
been quite awhile since i ast saw her too.

had a fun time wif the girls(:

2009-01-28T00:42:00.000-08:00

finally updating bout cny! :D
went 1st aunt house for the first day.
stayed there the whole day!

and guess wat we do?
MAHJONG!!! :D
we play on the eve too! (:

nth much happen.
kinda same every year.

wanzhen me and the kids(:

me and my nieces! :D

liyan and me(:

2nd day,

went cousin house at clementi.

his house has johnnie walker GOLD AND BLACK LABEL!

absoute vodka mango!

he offered us, but we wanted to play mahjong first.

(yes, mahjong again)

and then we left to uncle house at 5 for 1st part of the dinner.

and and and, we forgot to drink!!!!!! :(

so wasted.

i've always wanted to try vodka mango =/

after dat went woodlands for dinner again!

thats why i put on weight lahhhh :(

me and my most precious baby, zayden! :D

me and cousin. mother of 3!!

me and cousin, chong heng.

wanna noe hows my uck this year?

ny eve and 1st day i lost $15 bucks in mahjong.

2nd day i win back the $15 bucks pus $10(:

but, my phone spoil on the 2nd day.

so i went back home to change phone.

and guess wat, at night my sim card spoil!!!

gonna be an unlucky year ahead =/

2009-01-23T20:41:00.000-08:00

let pictures do the talking yea? :D

met up wif mun wah and sharry on fri 23/01/09!

went town walk walk wif mw first.

then sharry join us for dinner at 7 plus.

went to celebrate sharry's birthday at istana park(:

happy birthday sharry darling! :D

22/01/09

met up wif sheeny at fareast.

went for my fav. dessert!

durian ban zai! :D

see below!

pure durian wif whip cream wrapped in crepe(:

starbucks, warm lava cake! :D

nice nice yummy yummy(:

slack at cathay starbucks wif sheeny, chris, trac, andrew.

aftr awhile matthew and gina came and trac went off.

i oso went off around 1130 bah.

cause next day got sch.

me ans sheeny's couple ring! :D

my darling so sweet yea? :D

2009-01-14T06:03:00.000-08:00

life's abit haywire now.
things are so confusing
been busy wif school and stuffs.
sigh.
lets hope this year will get better yeah(:

2009-01-06T07:15:00.000-08:00

BIOCHEMISTRY ASSIGNMENT-
CHOCOLATE

Where does chocolate originate from?

-Cocoa originated in the Amazon.
-It was then brought into Europe and people started adding vanilla and sugars into the ground roasted beans.

Ingredient Composition

-Cocoa
-Vanilla
-Sugars
-Butter
-Hydrogenated fats

Chemical Composition

-Theophyline
-Telemethyhistamine
-Serotonin
-Tyramine
-Theobromine
-Endorphins
-Flavonoids

Theobromine

it is also known as xantheose,
a bitter alkaloid of the cacao plant.
a close structural relative of caffeine - differs from caffeine by only one methyl group.
Theobromine has a ten fold less stimulating effect to humans than caffeine,
a strong stimulant to the extent that it is able to keep someone awake throughout the night.
approximately 1.5% – 3% of theobromine in cacao and 0.5% -2.7% in chocolates.
But despite its name, the compound theobromine contains no bromine!

Effects of Theobromine

it is a myocardial stimulant & a vasodilator which means it increases heartbeat & dilates blood vessels, causing a reduction of blood pressure.
The draining effect allows it to treat cardiac failure, which can be caused by an excessive accumulation of fluid.
it has a lesser impact on the human central nervous system than caffeine.
cough-reducing effect.
helps to treat asthma as it relaxes the smooth muscles.
affects mood swings.
causes blood pressure and blood-sugar levels to rise, resulting in a feeling of alertness & contentment.

Endorphins

Endorphins is a group of ten neurotransmitters which activate opiate receptors.
It composed of chains of amino acids between 5 and several dozen members long.

Effects of Endorphins

Neurotransmitters are released into synapses when the body encounters stress
after a physical injury, endorphins activate opiate receptors & produce an analgesic effect, alleviating severe pain.
It is a neurochemical cause for the feeling of pleasure.
When endorphins are not activating receptors, no withdrawal symptoms are felt.
Enzymes break down endorphins as soon as they act on receptors, so they are never in contact with receptors long enough to form tolerance or dependency.

Magnesium

Magnesium is essential for good health.
It is the fourth most abundant mineral in the body.
Approximately 50% of total body magnesium is found in bone & the other half is found predominantly inside cells of body tissues and organs.
Only 1% of magnesium is found in blood, but the body works very hard to keep blood levels of magnesium constant.

Effects of Magnesium

Helps form bone cells & protein in the body.
Maintains normal functioning of muscles & nerves.
Promotes regular bowel function.
Lessens the drop in progesterone levels.
Keeps the heart rhythm steady.
Supports a healthy immune system.
Reduces the risk of developing diseases.
Enables muscles to relax .

Flavonoids

Derived from 2-phenylchromen-4-one (2-phenyl-1,4-benzopyrone) structure.
Commonly known as bioflavonoids in the mediathe terms are largely equivalent and interchangeable, as most flavonoids are biological in origin.

Effects of Flavonoids

Assist in wound repair.
Help in balancing certain hormones through the production of nitric oxide.
Contain antioxidants that may help spare other antioxidants which allow them to act longer to fight off foreign invaders.
Reduce platelet activity - decrease platelet aggregation and adhesion.
Hinder heart attack by preventing blockage of blood flow to the heart.
Allow the relaxation of blood vessel walls.
Reduce inflammation and blood levels of leukotrienes.

Disadvantages of Chocolates

Increase one’s sugar level, hence it is not very suitable for diabetic patients.
Unsatisfactory weight gain
Contain lead which is harmful as it can cause enduring harm to learning abilities, behaviour & coordination.
Tryptophan in chocolate is used in the brain to make serotonin, the neurotransmitter that can produce the feeling of ecstasy.

Good(Dark chocs) and Bad Chocolates

Dark chocolates contains more antioxidants.
it also has higher cocoa content which comprises of many chemicals.
Contains fewer calories, sugar & saturated fats.

Milk may interfere with the absorption of antioxidants into the body.
Avoid chocolates that have undergone the ‘dutch process’

2008-12-24T23:50:00.000-08:00

HOHOHO!
MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!! :D

havent been updating for long.
so gonna be a longgggggg post.
beware!

LAST WEEK (thursday)

went drinking wif adrain and zhuangli.
and 2 of their frens at bq.
I LOST MY FREAING PHONE!!
we were playing dice and had lots of fun.
ta quite abit and very fast feel seh alr.
think left it on the table and went toilet
came bac and its gone =/
vomitted quite abit but still feel damn horrible.
then suddenly hyperventilate.
cant breathe properly for quite awhile.
i tell u, really feel lyk dying =/
then they sent me to alexandra hosp =/
the girls took care of me and we split cab.
couldnt even stand properly =/
i oso dunno why and wat happen.
doc or nurses didnt say anything.
jus head them say hyperventilation.
was given an injection and oxygen mask.
measured bp, heart rate dats all =/
felt real terrible at some point of time.
it was a real horrible experience!
dad came at 6 plus?
paid the bill and we went home.
of course kanna scolded lah.
but by the time i woke up i had a new sim card alr. haha.
dad is so efficient!

also went prawn fishing wif alvin but forgot which day.
its really fun!
and we got to eat the prawns we caught on the spot!:D
its abit cruel i do agree.

THIS WEEK
MONDAY

went clubbing wif sheeny at zouk.
starting was boring cause we reach quite early.
then things start to get fun! (:
we got to know this grp of guys who are really funny and nice! (:
junyang,chris, sebas, hongyi, matthew, trac.
trac really look abit lyk lin jun jie!
we dance together and then when the whole thing end they came over my hse here for supper.
slack till 6 plus then me and sheeny went home.

TUESDAY
went out wif **. met him at vivo and i was late for almost 2 hrs!
cause i overslept=/
had dinner and went shopping!
** bought me a LV WALLET!! :D
so nice rite? :D
authentic one hor.....
i will rather carry no brand than a fake one.
haha.
cost $1180!!!!
so sweet of him(:
after shopping went to sing k.
all the way till 1 plus or 2 plus?
then he send me home.

WEDNESDAY
christmas eve!
went to play mahjong in the afternoon.
after dat went to work.
and then meet up wif the group of guys from zouk.

met them at ps then waited for junyang to come.
after dat went to find sheeny.
but she was wif her other grp of frens lah.
so she didnt come along :(

cabbed to bq after jy came.
went to next stop.
after dat incident i really dun dare to drink much anymore.
i drank around 3-4 cups only?
so guai rite? :D

alot of ppl was dere lah.
jy frens mostly.
they drink until very hiong de.
neat and neat. crazy ppl -.-
haas. of course got drunk very fast -.-
and i had to take care of them lahh...
especially trac and jy =/
trac vomitted alot!
ohya, and i lost my phone again =/
too busy taking care of them =/

after few hours all sober up abit then we went sg river to slack.
chit-chat and all and then jy and wei shun send me home around 7 plus 8plus?

THURSDAY and FRIDAY!
slept till evening.
woke up prepare and went down to meet jy at ps.
collect my new sim card.
then jy met his frens, fabian and faizal.
went to have dinner and then me and jy watched yes man!
the movie is nice(:
but would be nicer if we hadnt sat in the first row =/

fnish movie around 11 plus.
then chris and matthew came to join us.
ton again!
they went for supper then we went to play pool at concorde hotel.
after pool play lan!
my first time playing lan(:
played life 4 dead.
its fun!
kill zombie de.
me being a newbie die alot of times lah.
haha. they help me alot.

play till 4 plus am then we walk to esplanade.
slack and wait for the sun to rise.
haas.
then jy sent me home(:
went home bathe and he waited for me downstairs(:
came down slack and chitchat.

after dat went to amk cause wanna meet mummy oso.
jy went home to bathe.
and i fell asleep on his sofa!!!!
so paiseh can =/
then he oso sleep. haha.

wake up went to meet weishun and go central meet mummy for dinner.
they came along cause mummy ask me to bring them(:
eat alr, mummy went off then we slack at amk.
chris and matthew came for awhile.
then chris pei me take train to raffles place but he stay in toa payoh(:

SATURDAY
had gess netballl gathering at kallang!! :D
met sinyee, peiqi, shimin, jiaying and jocelyn at tiong.
took 16 down to kallang.
lots of seniors was dere.
including those which graduated much much earlier than us.
played court games and slack, chit-chat.

1 plus went to kallang leisure park for lunch.
ate at pasta mania.
the fastest service i've ever seen.

after dat, jiaying, shimin, sinyee, peiqi and jasmin came over to my hse.
play majong and bluff.
loser have to do forfeit(:
borrow salt and toilet paper! :D

they left at 8 plus?
they jy came over to meet me(:
pei him eat dinner then slack at my hse here.
was planning to play mj wif chris they all oso but in the end they didnt wana come dwn =/
so slack at home and watch tv.
and he pat me to sleep(:

2008-12-14T01:27:00.001-08:00

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY REGINA! :D

went boat quay to celebrate her bdae.
got a big grp of ppl dere!
they open 2 bottle.
1 martell, 1 chivas.
i went around 11 plus.
but all reach around 9 plus.
so there wasnt much left =/
but luckily adrain and zhuangli was dere!
hees, i love playing dice wif adrain(:

gina and her bf so sweet lah.
i damn jealous can =/
i promise not to cry and yet i did again :(
thanks yuki for cheering me up, one of the girls and travis! (:

group photo! haas, i got to know so many more new frens(:

group photo 2! :D
they are a bunch of fun-loving guys(:

haha, see the 3 musketeers behind? :D

travis, yonglong, lewis.

me, gina, sebas.

sebas was from my pri school! :D

he still remembr me leh!

of course i remember him too.

haha. so qiao! :D

me and birthday girl! :D

i love you my girl! <3> the girls, me, the girl who work dere, gina, yuki.

yuki and me(:

im so red! even though i drank little =/

yonglong and me.

i very red leh!

cannot open my eyes cause the light veyr bright. haha.

im wearing travis jacket so lok abit toot lah. haha.

im closing my eyes totally -.-

ugly!

wanted to sing song wif yl de.

but then they leaving le.

haas. next time ok?! :D

went to play pool at katong sc.

reminds me of him :(

we ddidnt go dere before.

but i always pass by there when we go ecp or pp :(

i swear inside was freaking cold ok!

left around 430.
lewis sent me home.
thanks! :D

yours truly reached home and didnt feel lyk sleeping.

so camwhore :D

bear wif it ok? :D

tada, dat was how i spend my friday night.

hols are here!

dunno to be happy or sad.

i wanna drink and club my life away pls!

it takes away all my troubles.

homeclub this monday.

playclub on tues.

anyone? :D

2008-12-12T00:52:00.000-08:00

dental hygiene test was a killer.
studied lyk shit and i still dun think im gonna gt gd grades :(
too last min le :(

studied overnight wif mus, yongjun and jas at sunplaza mac.
reached dere around 1230.
most of the time i was stoning and being disturbed by some ahbengs and ahlians.
they talk damn loud ok!
lyk talking to ppl in KL liddat!
even though we blast our music we still can hear the girl laughter!
yj eventually call the police.
sg police are so not efficient ok!
took damn long to come.
police only ask them lower their voice and so on lor.

jasmine!

mus!

yj stoning. haha.

guess wat was i doing?

i was playing pets society!!

hahahaha.

2008-12-11T14:01:00.000-08:00

can you blieve it???!!!
its 6.02am and im here at sembawang sunplaza mac wif mus and jasmine studying!!!
se, miracle happen again!!
go buy toto ok.
think will strike first price man! :D
let me give u a lucky number, 1129!!
noe y? cause its the module code.
the sucky dental hygiene that im studying now!
wish me good luck for my tst pls!!
need lots of luck!

2008-12-10T07:54:00.000-08:00

wow, im getting so much better(:
it may be a good thing that we broke up after all.
im so motivated now.
to study hard and slim down.
my goal for this month, lose 5kg by the end of this month.
and win yongjun in this sem!
i wanna get at least a 2.5 gpa this sem.
cross my heart, im gonna do it.
by hook or by crook(:
my frens says im pretty, so i should not be bothered by wat he said anymore.
i still have plenty of other guys rite. haha.
i will learn to be more confident of myself.
and of course, that will have to be when i slimmed down succesfully.
lets hope i wont give up halfway again this time(:
pray hard for me please(:

miracle happened today!
i got a B+ for oral pathology and C+ for radiography!!
which i didnt even finish studying. haas.
i guess luck is really on my side(:
if im not wrong, im gonna get a B for biosci(:
hope i can get at least a B! :D

my goal, study hard, save up money.
and after this 3 yrs i wanna go melbourne and study dentistry.
dat would mean save lyk hell!
but yeah, i hope i can do it.

and tell u something ok, i didnt cry today! :D
not a single tear shed!
im a brave and strong girl.
even though i really felt abit emo jus now =/
move on girl. you can do it(:

2008-12-08T13:36:00.000-08:00

it all ended.
yeah, everything.
after all that i've done, what i got back was,
you've tried your best, but something is missing.
thanks for showing me how unreliable love can be.
how things can fucking go wrong in jus half an hour.

mayb if u lied to me again, i'll believe you.
even i noe it will be another lie, i still chose to believe you.
but no, you didnt even bother to explain.
must less comfort me.
i believed you.
and trust all that i have in you.

i feel lyk a fool, giving all dat i can.
and yet, it still turn out to be this ending.
i wish i can be strong,
lyk all the other girls out dere.
jus end it wif dignity and pride.
but i cant, im such a loser.

things kept on replaying in my mind.
i cant even slp in peace.
how i wish it was jus a nightmare.
and when i wake up everything will be back to normal.
you'll still be dere and i'll still think im the only one.

lyk wat they said, i've been living in self denial.
and yes, i would rather be.
at least i will still be happy and you will still be dere.
i dun wish to face this ugly world alone.
i wish you were still here.
to share my day and joy and happiness.
or to feel the hurt in me and comfort me.
i need your hug,
your reassuring voice.
telling me its all ok,
and you still love me the most.
i need you to wipe away my tears, and ask me not to cry.
say you feel hurt that i cried.
say dat you do care.

how could things go so wrong.
we were still happy and laughing jus awhile ago.
i wish i wasnt so curious,
i wish i hasnt seen the msg.
i rather live in self denial.
i rather you lied to me than for me to face this pain alone.

i wish i was strong.
i've expected it all along.
its not really a shock to me.
so why cant i face it wif my head held up high and say its ok?
i've repeated this scenario over and over again in my head,
so why, when it comes to reality i cant do it.
i really cant handle this pain anymore.
its too much.
i wish i can jus drop dead on the spot.
or to slp and nv wake up.
then i will not have to bear wif this pain.

every single thing remind me of you.
every single thing u said are repeated over and over in my head.
all the promises you gave, where did it go?
all the things you said, did you really mean it?

wat have i done to deserve this?

2008-12-04T06:00:00.000-08:00

sis is coming back from hongkong tml!
finally!
this week pass quite fast.
due to work, work and more work.

and i realise i had nv blog about my attachment before!
so ya, had attachment today.
its once every 2 weeks at NUH, faculty of dentistry.
we basically observe how the undergraduate treats the patient.
and observe the taking of x-ray.
half of the class will go for attachment while the rest have practical in school!
we practically slack at NUH lah.
nth to do jus walk around and slack and keep on having break! :D

today quite fun.
we get to see pediatric dentistry.
which is children's dentistry.
the kids are so cute! :D
got this down's syndrome boy.
he's damn brave and sweet lah(:
so cute :D

2008-12-01T21:09:00.000-08:00

i hate hate hate hate weekdays.
sigh. especially so since dear went for attachment.
he seems so busy and have no time to meet up.
as usual, i'll get all emotional and totally no mood for anything else.
i should learn to control my emotions.
it always gets the upper hand.
my life sucks.

my financial also getting very low.
tell me how to survive this christmas?
i have not been shopping for around 1 month.
and my money still doesnt grow.
my pay for this current job aint enough at all.
its only jus enough for me to pay for my lappy monthly installments.
and after dat, i have nth left.
sigh. life is so hard without money.
and christmas is coming.
i dun even have money for my own shopping :(
and dear's present as well :(
life doesnt look too good now.
i need a higher pay job.
around $8/hr or more.
but for short hours.
any intro?

i miss him ultra much.
things are gg haywire.
exams are coming and tell u wat, i havent start much studying.
jus hope i will not fail.
dun harbour too much hope PL, A's are impossible for you =x

2008-11-22T06:51:00.000-08:00

me and dear(: while waiting for bus home.

on bus. emo kid. haha.

was suppose to meet dear 4 at parkway parade.

gg east coast(:

but i was late. reach at 430=/

so sorry dear!

it looked lyk it was gg to rain so we stay in pp walk around.

then went to play arcade.

left pp at around 7 and went to the petshop nearby which sells alot of pets! :D

dear likes the rabbits alot!

the rabbit got brown eye ring. look lyk panda! so cute! :D

had dinner at the hawker centre nearby after dat.

supposed to be popular hokkien mee stall wif alot of newspaper posters etc.

but its not nice =/

dear ate pontian wanton noodles.

the one used to be at heeren.

i prefer the heeren one. nicer.

after dat walk to ecp(:

slacked and chit chat.

after dat walked to mac dere
saw this fun fair for kids.
got merry-go-round, ferris wheel and pirate ship! :D
but the things look so old.

see above.

the evidence.

looks lyk haunted funfair!

hahahhas.

saw candy floss and was damn tempted!

long time since i had 1(:

but the aunty make until quite ugly.

haas.

dear likes it.

eat alot! :D

see his unglamness.

can tell he lyks it ehhh.

hahahaha. mouth open until so big!

went home after dat.
saw tiffany wif her bf(:

i enjoyed myself alot.

i love spending time wif dear(:

2008-11-19T07:35:00.000-08:00

im a total bitch in friendster!
hahaha.
go read my profile and u'll noe wat i mean.
or try clinking on ppl who wrote me comments.
see wat i reply them.
hahahaha.
im being such a bitch to other ppl but a total angel to my dear(:

finally went back to sch today!
and im late for 7 mins!
still acceptable. haas.
pratically sleep the whole day.
other than DR Ali's class.

rush off to meet dear after sch ended at 5.
finally get to see him after 2 days.
those 2 days seems forever lah!!

he ended work at 430.
so reached dhoby early.
jess and ash came along oso.
ash, waiting for bf.
jess, dun wanna go home.
haha.
after i met up wif dear then we spilt.
walk around then had dinner at foodcourt.
saw jess and ash again.
and they startd tslking about my unglam stuff in sch!!!
OMG!! REALLY PS!!
then they left and we went to play arcade.
after dat walk walk.
then dear's mum call him.
and h got so angry and started solding at his mum.
so scary lah!!
he damn fierce.
den whole face black black.
sigh.
first time see him liddat.
think he too stress over his fyp oso =/
if only i can be of help :(
after dat he send me to bustop and i saw darius!
anw, dats all for today.
wat a boring day.
but makes fun because of dear.
wonder when i can see him again.
sigh.

2008-11-18T08:39:00.001-08:00

i guess staying at home really makes me bored.
makes me feel lyk blogging every single min.
i told this afternoon i wanna get married and give birth.
guess her reaction?
.
.
.
.
.
of course she scolded me lah.
hahahaha.
motherly instinct kicking in!

paul lim zhan ye!! when will u show me to ur frens and introduce me as ur gf :(
mayb they roughly guess so alr. but i wannabe official.
i wan u to be proud of me, show to ur frens and family.
put in ur friendster as attached not single!
sigh. i dun wan u to msg other girls.
cause im insecure.
i always feel dat they are more than jus frens.
so afraid of knowing the truth.
can u do wat u promise?
so far it still seems lyk there is quite abit of empty promises =/
i wan u to suggest meetup.
not always me.
i wan u to be nice to me.
to reallly care for me.
to worry about me.
its weird that u nv once asked whether i reached home safely.
or ask me to be careful on the way home and text u when i reach home.
isnt dat wat normal bf say to their gf?
even my fren say we talk lyk normal frens.
dun even look lyk a couple.
i oso realise we have nth much to talk about.
sigh. what can i do to salvage this situation?
can u tell me wat to do?

i really wanna show u to my family.
but i noe u dun wanna meet them.
mum was asking me about my bf.
and i lied to her saying im single.
she say if have must show her.
grandma oso say so.
she said show her before she dies.
didnt noe my mother side so open de.
usually they very traditional towards other stuff.
hmmm. will dat day comes, when i proudly show u to my parents?
and u show me to ur parents too?
i doubt so :(
im not the ideal one rite? :(

2008-11-17T21:06:00.000-08:00

sob sob.
im rotting at home.
should have went school.
staying at home jus makes me miss dear more =(
2 days gone without seeing him.
i hate his attachment lah!! :(
no more meeting in the morning.
sigh. no motivation to go sch.
think i'll always be late or pon sch now.
i miss him alot. really alot.
sigh. if only we can stay together.
so good!! but think he will go crazy. ha.
i seriously think i have no life at all.
other than gg out wif him, i've no one else to go out wif :(
sob. life sucks.
i miss dear lots lots lots.
sigh. i miss ur hugs and kisses :(

2008-11-17T01:53:00.000-08:00

everyone, please help to click on the advertisment at the top of the page!
thanks alot! :D

didnt go to sch today.
down wif a very bad flu.
and anw, no mood to go either.
i miss dear badly.
got 2 days mc.
should i go to sch tml?
hmmm.
hope i can meet dear after his attachment for dinner =/

2008-11-16T07:34:00.000-08:00

COUSIN'S BIRTHAY CLEBRATION ON 15 NOV!

went dear's house in the afternoon to mahjong wif his classmates.
overall win abit. around 2 bucks. haha.
mahjong is so fun(:
left at around 7.
dear drive me to pass jess bag and then to aljunied mrt.
so that it will be nearer for me when i take train to pasir ris(:
so sweet of him(:

reach costa sands nearing 8.
alot of ppl lah!!
cause its sat!!
alot of family gathering, birthday celebration.

reached and started bbq!
and of course, my mother side being a traditional family,
it is the younger generation responsibilities to bbq for the older generation.
bloody hell, they could have ask nicer i swear.
they make it sounds lyk its our job to bbq for them.
assholes. i hate my mum side relatives.
especially my grandma.
she is so biased one ok.
i've not had a good impression of her since young.
i dread seeing her.

me and mummy! so long nv see her! think a few months alr =/

birthday girl! cousin jerene!

my cousin and his gf! hope they can ge married soon.

been a long time since i last attended wedding.

haha.

bbq pit! see the guy in blue shorts?

he helps me bbq and do the fire.

i say i wan eat sweet potato so he help me bbq and gave me 3!

when i only ask for 1 -.-

haha. so nice(:

he keep on tempting me wif the vodka!

and then say i underage cannot drink -.-

another guy oso very nice.

he bbq alr then let me take his food.
hahaha. all cousin's colleague

pretty brithday cake which wrotes, happy birthday jerene!

left at 1115.

on the way to interchange. pass by ehub!

so pretty!

there's a indoor ferris wheel! :D
mayb one day i'll come here and shop(:

reach interchange and chiong to mrt station.
but we still missed the train=/
so no choice had to take 5 which takes around an hr plus to reach home.
and guess wat, no more bus either -.-
so had to cab home!!!
damn ex lah from pasir ris to tiong bahru plus midnight charge somemore.
OMG. i feel so broke =/
the cab damn cool. got tv!
only show advertisment and landmarks.
but still very cool!! :D

TODAY
dear came over and slack(:
played this game call hotel626.
u should try, here's the link
www.hotel626.com
this game can only be played between 6pm to 6am.
u can change ur com clock if u wanna play in the morning.

went to have dinner at tiong bahru plaza.
indonesian grill is nice! :D
after dat went to buy tiong bahru pao!
he say the siew mai is nice.
but then no more le =/
dear drove me home after dat(:

sian, his attachment starts tml,
which means i cant meet him in sch early in the morning anymore :(
which oso means, i'll more likely pon sch cause got no motivation to go sch and see him :(
sob sob.

ahhhhh. having flu now.
i hate it :(

2008-11-15T08:28:00.000-08:00

have you ever taken a cab or car along the PIE?
from pasir ris all the way to bukit mearh?
firstly, its damn ex!

but besides dat, u see very nice scenary(:
the stretch of east coast park.
where u see all the bright lights of seafod restaurant.

and then it passes by the city area.
the singapore flyer, the CBD, singapore river and the building casino.
it was 12 am.
and yet, the lights were still on.
the scenary is so pretty!
but that doesnt make me feel happy.
instead it makes me feel even lonelier.
its lyk u're the only one among all those tall buildings.
i felt lost and empty deep inside.

PIE makes me sad =(

2008-11-14T10:02:00.000-08:00

HAPPY 4 MONTHS DEAR :D

this 4 months havent been easy on both of us.
u said u're getting use to my emo-ness.
does dat means u wont care anymore? :(

u said about ur ex too emo, then u broke up wif her.
will it happen to me too?
i oso dun wanna be emo.
but things always happen.
mayb i think too much or wat bah.
but i really cant help it =/
i love you and i scare to lose u.
thats y i think so much.

deardear, i wan us to last forever(:
will we?
hugs, i love you(:

met dear after school.
went for massage at serangoon dere.
so shiok!! :D
thanks to dear i get free massage(:

after dat went to have dinner.
seafood beehoon is nice!
dear always have nice food recommendation! :D
so unfair ok, he eat so much but he doesnt grow fat!
afetr eating seafood beehoon he can still finsh a bowl of wanton noodles!
pro rite? haas.
went home after dat.

2008-11-13T05:29:00.000-08:00

ytd was feeling real down.

im glad dat i have all those nice frens, classmates!
thanks jess, for lendng me ur shoulder(:

and ester, yujuan for cheering me up(:

im glad to have u guys around! :D

things arent really gg well now.

i hope things can go well from now on.

no more bad news please,

im sure im gonna break down soon :(

and, i hope i can get the sponsorship!

pretty please! :D

2008-11-06T08:01:00.000-08:00

hey ppl, i will be uplloading more photos and update about school soon!
so keep coming back and check ok? :D
i mayb oso wanna start my own blogshop.
mayb start of by selling my own stuff first! haha.
can giv me ur comments?
in the mean time, help me click on the ads! thanks! :D

2008-11-04T06:00:00.000-08:00

happy deepavali! a very late post indeeed. haha. the first time i went little india other than primary school field trip. and i love all the skirts there lah(: a nice place where u can get all the long skirt at a very cheap price! :D

one of the stall in the bazaar which sells LOTS of flowers.

main purpose there was to accompany jess to get her threading done and she accompany me for dinner. but we ended up shopping! :D

YES, SHOPPING AT LITTLE INDIA!

all the pics are taken in the bazaar. its lyk chinese new year chinatown where they build all those tents to sell new year goodies. instead of chinese things they have henna, flowers, lots of bangles and accessories, indian food, decorations, and shirts! me and jess bought a skirt from dere(:

only $16 bucks! cheap and nice! :D we got he same one but different colour. haha.

they really sell lots of different bangles as u can see in the above 2 pics! wide selection, from colours to designs . u wan wat, they have wat!

before dat in school we were doing radiography. and we had to process xray films! so cool ok(: and we get to xray our personal things! so i did 1 wif my heels! :D

" the model in the bio lab. my new bf, the "muscle man" he has so much muscles! haha.

2008-10-30T08:18:00.000-07:00

TO KIM:
hahahaha.
nothing else to say?
thanks to u my blog got so much tags now!
woots~ first time man(:
but anw, u sucks(:
u must be someone who either know me or paul.
and i wonder who.
why not u tell me who u are and we thrash things out face to face?
easier and faster.

thanks wj, yen, jess, ester and jyi for denfending me(:
yay! i got nice frens(:

2008-10-29T03:55:00.001-07:00

TO KIM:
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.
i dun need you to teach me what to do or criticise my r/s.
and how did you noe so much about me?
how you noe i met him from the net?
jus who the hell are you?
if u dare, tell me who you are.
dare to comment, dare to tell your name.
why not show ur face?
i'll see whether are you really dat pretty to comment on others.
saying others is a loser?
then how about you?
dun dare to tell ur name and show urself.
dat makes u a winner?
OMG, STOP BEING SO FULL OF YOURSELF!
seriously, i wanna wat kind of r/s i choose it myself.
ur business? who the hell are u lah.
dun think i wasnt harsh in my previous post means im easily bullied ok.
if u're smart enough, u should apologise.
its my life. i choose wat i wan.
NONE OF UR PROBLEM!
get a life lah. u got nothing better to do izzit?
LOSER.

2008-10-28T06:36:00.000-07:00

TO KIM:
hmmm. cant believe im using my precious time to write a post in reply to your tags.
firstly, wat u said at first and wat u said in the last few tags have no links at all? =/
pls, wat are you trying to prove?
did i ever say dat my bf is good-looking?
and have you seen him before in real life?
so who are you to judge?
im blind??!!!
hello, if i am, how am i suppose to blog?
hahahaha. ok. i noe wat you mean.
hmmmm. if you noe me, you would noe that i kinda judge guys base on looks.
those guys whom are on good terms wif me, the looks must at least be passable.
not to say that im very pretty or whatsoever that i have to choose my frens.
no, its jus that first impression do count.
and normally if you see a goodlooking person u would naturally feel good about him?
dat is how i felt when i saw my bf.
to me, he is not bad looking.
of course there are other more shuai guys out dere.
and plus im not pretty either.
so doesnt it match?
ugly and ugly u would say?
hahahaha.
it doesnt matter wat u think, all it matters is wat I THINK.
BECAUSE HE IS MY BF AND NOT URS.
you can say and think whatever you wan because its ur personal opinion.
but as a form of respect, i think u shouldnt condemn someone jus by the looks.
indeed, he may treat me bad at times.
but there are times which he treats me nice too.
jus dat i didnt blog about it.
i blog about the bad times cause i have no one to talk to and i need a place to vent my emotions on.
i still think u shouldt say such a bad thing about a person when u neva see him before.
i lyk him not cause of his looks or wat.
is because he's humorous and he neva fails to brighten my day.
have you ever been so in love that jus by seeing the person makes u happy no matter how bad your day was?
if u been through that, u would understand how i feel.
if ur bf treats u lyk how mine treats me, mayb u wont wanna be wif dat person.
but to me, no.
i dn give up easily in r/s.
i believe as long as im nice to him, 1 day he will appreciate everything i've done.
althought dat day may neva come.
but i dun wanna give up.
at least not now.
because i believe he still treats me reasonably well.
at least, he doesnt scold me, hit me or abuse me.
he still calls me dear, console me when im sad.
give me hugs and kisses, send me to the station.
bear wif all my snorings! haha.
if u're my close fren, you would noe i change alot for him.
and why? cause i believe he's worth it.
if he's not goodlooking, then why the hell am i so scare of losing him to other girls?
i still think im not good enough for him.
not pretty enough, not slim enough.
he may not treat me as nice as my ex bf does.
but to me, he is still the best bf i've ever had.

2008-10-26T08:54:00.000-07:00

you get irritated so easily.
am i so irritating?
u dun even talk much to me anymore.
wat is wrong?

u may call me dear.
but does it means the same?
dear means someone or something important to you.
but am i?

sometimes when i see you.
i dun even feel that i noe you.
you seem so distant from me.
so unfamiliar than the one i noe before.

izzit you that im hugging or izzit jus someone who looks really lyk you?

2008-10-14T06:56:00.000-07:00

HAPPY THIRD MONTH DEAR! :D

i'm always happy whenever im wif you(:

you never fail to brighten up my life jus being by my side and not doing anything.

i love you for being you(:

i wanna walk every brigde in my life wif you. but do you? will you wait for me?

the cake i bake for you on your brithday(:

the time when you took me to eat the $2 nasilemak!

wat i love about you, is your bright smile. which never fails to cheer me up(:

this exact same smile that attracts me to you(:

we've been through quite alot this 3 months ehh.

every little thing you do.

everything we do together is eched in my mind.

a precious memory.

i wanna have more fun and loving memories wif you.

instead of all the tears and jealousy. can?

i love you wif all my heart(:

its a late entry. so lets retrack back to 14th october!

2008-10-12T00:15:00.000-07:00

went east coast cycling wif p, jess and gloria on the last day of holiday!! :D
met p at his house dere around 2 plus and then took bus to parkway parade.
ate at the foodcourt wif p and shortly afetr, jess reached.
followed by gloria.

walk to east coast and on the way pass by this petshop and they sell realy adorable rabbits!
p should really get one to accompany charcoal. haha.

reached ecp me and p rented double bike :D
and gloria should rent a children bike.
hahaha. cause she almost couldnt touch the ground wif a normal(too low for me) bike!

then we got lost. for around an hr!
so me and p went to get our dinner first. before returning the bike.
packet the laksa. quite nice(:
so while riding back finally saw them.

returned the bike and jess and gloria went to packet dinner.
and then we sat at the breakwater there and have our dinner!!
first time eating at breakwater dere leh!!
and first time dere wif p!!
so happy lah:D
eat and talk alot wif p.
and got to know alot of things too.
make me so jealous and abit sad =/
left at 9 plus.
and tada, dat was my last day of sem 1 sch hols =/

2008-10-10T23:41:00.000-07:00

let the pictures do the talking(:
spent last week of my holiday doing something which i've missed for a long time!
clubbing on thursday at home club!! :D
went wif the girls. regina and sheeny and one of his guy fren.

we went in kinda late. but the mood was dere.
gotten very high and the dance was great(:
minus the part that most guys who surround us are all
1. ugly
2. nerd.
3. bad fashion sense.
sine when did good old nerds go club?
thought they should be at home studying? geez.
ugly drssing wif baggy ugly tshirt and jeans.
PLUS, THEY WORE SPECS!!!
THOSE NERDY KIND OF SPECS U EXPECT TO SEE IN A TOP STUDENT!
OMG. PLUS THE HAIR!!
STANDARD GOING-TO-SCHOOL KINDA HAIR NOT WITH A BIT OF STYLE.
but wat to expect? its jus homeclub.
not lyk zouk or mos. where u can see better dressed guys.
these guys are lyk gg there for a little experience so dey can write their essays on night life in singapore!!!
hhahahaha. im jus so mean =/
the homeclub pratically have no handsome guys who caught my attention.
except mayb 1 or 2. hahaha.
ton till morning at the singapore river there and then took bus home.

next day went drinking wif regina, sheeny, adrian and zhuangli at boat quay after my work.
it was very fun!
especially sicne i've not seen adrian for more than half a year!
aand he was a very good entertainment for us girls at the club(:
met them at beer belly around 2 plus.
we drank, sang, played till 6!
chivas, whiskey coke, vodka sprite!
im in a sober state but jus dat i was crooked lyk regina. haha.
slack awhile then went home.
and

2008-10-07T19:33:00.000-07:00

below is the lyrics for chong dong by elva!
i think the song and the lyrics are quite touching.

很感激这城市拥挤的交通
让你我还能多相处几分钟
人潮中怕失散所以轻轻拉你的手
一刻不放松不放松

忍不住想要爱你的冲动
不确定你属于我会有点寂寞
你给的幸福在我心中自由走动
抚平我每一个伤口

忍不住想要吻你的冲动
不确定我的执着能让你感动
我只能相信自己感受不怕失落
关于你的一切我想要比谁都懂

我的心是被你设定的闹钟
提醒我想你的时间不够用
为什么平淡的事情现在忽然生动
是你改变我你改变我

忍不住想要爱你的冲动
不确定你属于我会有点寂寞
你给的幸福在我心中自由走动
抚平我每一个伤口

忍不住想要吻你的冲动
不确定我的执着能让你感动
我只能相信自己感受不怕失落
关于你的一切我想要比谁都懂

你是情人还是朋友
还没勇气想得太多
你的世界如此辽阔
我会在那个角落

忍不住想要爱你的冲动
不确定你属于我会有点寂寞
你给的幸福在我心中自由走动
抚平我每一个伤口

忍不住想要吻你的冲动
不确定我的执着能让你感动
我只能相信自己感受不怕失落
关于你的一切我想要比谁都懂

2008-10-07T07:49:00.000-07:00

went sentosa wif p on monday! 06/10/08
met him at vivo and took monorail in.
finally get to suntan!
have been wanting to go the whole hols!

went palawan beach.
silosa always have alot of ppl.
and im anti-social! haha.

tan for around 2 hrs?
then went vivo for lunch!
ate at asian kitchen.
p didnt really lyk it =/
say i got bad recommendation.

went p's house after dat to play mahjong wif his classmates.
we play all the way from around 4pm till next day 8am!
ordered canadian pizza for dinner.
and it make most of us stomach ache! except 1 girl! =/
slept at his place after dat till evening time then went out for dinner.

thia is p's rabbit, charcoal!
he's licking my fingers! cute rite?! :D
since when u see a rabbit lick humans? hhaah.

2008-10-02T09:54:00.000-07:00

cousin birthday on tuesday!!

HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY CHONGHENG!! :D

went bugis wif liyan and sis to get chong's present.

share a tshirt from levis wif them.

then had dinner at shokudo cafe.

diffeent form the one at cine =/

sis's omelette rice wif curry pork shop! looks quite nice at first before she starts eating. ahha.

the curry!

im the only one who eats pasta =/ feel kinda waste money though.
saem price as the curry omu rice =/
but this pasta is nice! quite different from other pasta elsewhere.
so at least i dun feel so heartache. haha.

then went mind's cafe!
in case u dunno, its a place where ppl play boardgames!
meet up wif wanzhen, chong's sis.
we plan to giv chong surprise. haha.
slack and waited for his frens to arrive.
and then came the birthday boy! :D

the very nice chocolate mousse cake from jack's place! :D

birthday boy chong heng! :D
happily cutting his cake. haha.

then we started playing games!
played this game call cash and gun.
haha. abit lame lah.
but interesting.

see! got guns leh!
happily arranging all the items. haha!

the mountain tortoise who waste 10+ to play game of life =/

7 ppl worth of munchies! :D ultra fattening.

p came at 9 to join us(:
then we played uglydolls!
an ultra violent game which involves snatching of the cards!
p got some scratches and blue-black :(
he oso very ungentlemen lah!
snatch my cards! haha.
he always win cause he damn violent oso!

the cousins! :D

family photo of the day! :D
from left p(: me, sis, wanzhen, jieling, liyan, sini, umar, chong, didnt catch his name!

wanzhen unglam pic of the day! haha!

me and wanzhen! heh.
p and me! :D :D :D
finally a photo taken together! :D
so happpy please!
i look damn fat and ugly without make-up :(

2008-09-30T10:39:00.000-07:00

to the juniors,

you all think u understand.
so why not be in my shoe and try it?
its not as easy as wat u think.
yea, try hard and u'll get it. earn yourself a position?
bullshit!
how hard am i suppose to go for it?
trian everyday?
sorry, i have no time and life is short i dun wanna waste it on training for something which has no use after this 3 yrs of school.
i would rather do something more practical something i would enjoy more.
which i feel much much happier.
isnt dat better? more worthwhile?
training wif u all is fun sometimes.
but most of the time it jus reminds me of how lousy i am in front of u all.
i dun wanna go for something which i see no point in.
try hard?
so?
wat can i get?
seriously lah, at most jus 1 yr of competition.
truth is i dun feel the bond wif u all.
i feel outcasted whenever im wif u all.
we're a team?
no, u all are a team.
i dun belong there.
i dreaded every singe training.
so wats the point of gg?
shouldnt netball be something enjoyable?
why does it seems lyk a torture to me now?
every training is lyk a torture.
im dreading the start of it and looking forward to the end.
passion for netball??
sorry, i dun feel as passionate about it anymore.
i use to love it in sec sch.
where all my teamates are dere.
jy, sm, sy, pq.
i miss them i miss the old netball.
where everything we do is fun.
results is impt. but the process is even more precious isnt it?
but i feel dat in nyp, results is the most impt thing.
who cares about the fucking process?
all u need is good players.
and im not.
so why should i be dere to drag the team down.
to slow down the whole trng?
im the lousiet in the team, and im sure u all feel dat too.
jus dat u all dun say it out.
to me, netball aint as impt as my dog, bf, family and work.
ya, i would rather spend my time wif bf.
and why? cause i feel happier!
simple?! netball only makes me feel sad.
so why should i sarcrifice something enjoyable for something torturous?
tell me, would u rather chooose something more fun or something bad?
so am i wrong?
if so, wat wrong have i done?
even if i quit netball, does it affect u all?
no it doesnt, in fact its better isnt it?
at least u all dunnid to care for my feelings and keep on cheering me up.
im a burden to the team, to u all.
the SIM match jus shows me how different i am from you all.
seriously, are all of us really dat close?
do we talk about other things beside netballl?
so wats makes u think u understand me?
understand wat im gg through?
understand how i feel and wat i want?
wat shihui say is true, im a loser.
and i lyk to avoid the reality.
i hate facing it.
im quitting nyp netball.
lets jus hope we still can remain as frens.

2008-09-26T10:39:00.000-07:00

boooooooo!
stupid rain today!
spoil my sentosa trip :(

i woke up in the middle of the night and it started raining heavily.
so i was hoping it would stop by morning.
cause i plan to go sentosa wif p at 10.
then it rain till 10!!!!!!! :(
there goes my suntan :(

anw arrange to meet 1230 at vivo.
he was late but i was later =x
cabbed down cause he sounded angry =x

walk around and i was feeling so freaking tired!
seriously lack of sleep. =/

and the must-do when at vivo is see puppies! :D
got shetland puppies! so cute! :D
the golden retriever oso very cute! :D

played arcade again(:
our new hobby(:
everytime play game lose to him.
not fun at all =x
bball machine was down! bloody hell!

then we took bus to town.
freaking long!
jammed at chinatown area =/

i was freaking hungry by dinner time cause didnt eat anything the whole day.
ate at waraku!
the creamy udon nice.
but dun really lyk the ramen.

went cine buy tix for mirrors!
recently watch alot of m18 movies(:
heh heh. i look MATURE! not old.
while waiting for movie to start went to play arcade again(:
saw tiffany and gang.
then finally get to play bball! :D

mirrors is quite nice.
but damn damn damn GROSS!
i understand why its M18!
super ultra GROSS! =S
the progress of the movie not bad lah.
abit of thriller plus horror.
oh ya, p can mae really scary faces! look totally lyk ghost!!!! =/
scare the hell outta me in cinema lah!

walk wif him to ps cause he taking train from dere.
he accompany me wait for bus(:
i love spending time wif him.
but was abit grumpy today due to stupid menses and not enough sleep =/
he say i pms =/

HE BOUGHT A PAIR OF EARRINGS FOR ME! :D
CAUSE I SAY I WAN IT BUT NO MONEY. HAHA.
SO HAPPY OKAY! :D
THANKS DEAREST(:

2008-09-24T11:42:00.000-07:00

hmm. came upon a blog.
something interesting she blog about and totally lyk wat im feeling.

"its fcking scary to love someone luh
and fcking hurting when he said "maybe we should just remain as good friends"
its SO hard to love someone , even harder to let go of someone u love
thats why ppl get hurt .
hurt again n again n again n again
i think i’m kinda getting used to it already
just a few days and pain subsides
love is like a fcking piercing at ur heart
hurts for a few days / weeks
den totally seasoned ..
meanwhile a needle slowly piercing through ur heart"

ya, a needle is slowly piercing through my heart every single moment when im wif him.
everything i do i think of him.
i can give up everything jus so dat he can be true to me and love me wholeheartedly.
ppl says im stupid and dumb for always giving in.
but wat to do?
im jus so blinded by love.
haas. someone even told me this sentence,
"now i noe why they say love is blind, u really am blind!"

2008-09-21T22:39:00.000-07:00

went out wif cousin to vivo! :D
cause she wanna get a dress for her company's DND.
as usual, i was late=/

after few hours of shopping we had dinner at asian kitchen! :D

my zhajiang mian(: nice when put wif alot alot of chilli! :D

cousin's prawn fried nice whihc is very nice too! the rice is very fragrant(:

my cousin liyan! :D *she's so gonna kill me when she sees this*

of course not forgetting my beloved xiao long bao! :D after craving for so long finally get to eat it! :D

and we ordered this red bean dumpling for desert which is very nice too! :D

its so small and cute! :D

see the red bean inside? so nice lah! hothot one! :D

yayness, a delicious dinner which cost each of us $15 only!!!! for so much food!!! :D
no wonder im fat =/

went shopping and i got 2 tops and 1 perfume(: wanted to get another long skirt but when i went down it was sold alr! :(

this perfume smell so nice! sweet smelling although its not really branded. still cost me $50++ after 40% discount!

been spending alot these few days! i need my pay!

2008-09-19T22:57:00.000-07:00

she so zilian! keep on taking photos of herself. haha.

went out wif regina, yuki and jian de at first for dinner.
but then saw ariza working. so went to meet her after her work.
and then she decided to accompany me and go home late(:

we went shopping!
and she finally got me my birthday present after 3 mths!
a mango t-shirt(: thanks babe! :D

walk around town and we both of our mouths were quote itchy. haha. so we got some food!
went for dresert, durian crepe! nice! :D
and then she had her sausauge cheese egg crepe.
wanted to get waffles at first but too ex.
then we shared a bowl of laksa! :D

finally did my eyebrow trimming after damn long(:
we camwhored alot as u can see. haha.
went home at 9 plus and i enjoyed myself! :D

2008-09-17T13:43:00.000-07:00

i'm missing baby greatly :(
didnt get to see him the past 2 days :(
gonna see him tml(:
cant wait(:

anw, i'll update wat i did over the weekends when i have the time to.
*actually i have the time but jus lazy* :P

2008-09-12T09:59:00.000-07:00

FRIDAY
went to sis's school for mid autumn celebration wif cousin(:
reach there quite early and we got some food and settle down.
our main purpose dere is to watch her guitar performance and take video! :D

her band was performing.

my sis is the one on the right wif the guitar :D
she really hate us taking video and pictures of her. haha.
anw, watch her video in youtube!

me and cousin's pretty lanterns(:
met p after this.
slack at my house for awhile then he went home le.

SATURDAY
had netball carnival at SIM!
played wif the juniors.
kesh, jing, shihui and jacq.
didnt manage to get into top 4
but we got 5th out of 9 teams.
not bad alr lah.
considering this is our first time playing together and there were stronger opponents lyk the NTU.
jing and sh went to do the rock climbing and we laughed so much! :D

5 of us cabbed to queensway after dat.
cause jacq wanna collect her fbt.
so i got myself 1 and we proceed to changi airport for popeyes! :D
all of us was alr starving lyk hell.
cause we didnt have much for breakfast.
and then audrey was late and couldnt find her way.
so the lunch sort of became dinner.
only manage to eat at 5 plus =/
audrey! :D

jing went home and the rest went to walk around and chit chat after eating.
first from T3 to T2 then the view wasnt dat nice.
so we proceed to T1!
saw the national soccer goal keeper who was previously from nyp?
anw the night scenery is very very pretty! :D
we jus sat dere chitchat and watch planes land(:

on the sky train(:

left at 8 plus 9.
went to meet 2H peeps at henderson cc for gathering(:
played candles and captain ball.
very fun! :D
i enjoy being wif them!
full of laughter. haas
then most girls went home.
except me, sharry and sinyee plus the guys went for desert.

p came to stay over for the night(:
met him at hse downstairs after gathering.
judy and co. ask us to play bball wif them.
so play lor.
u can imagine how shag i was.
netball in the morning, captain ball at night, bball at midnight! =/
damn tired. we kanna screening from police =/
cause it was lyk 1 plus alr.

watch soccer wif p at coffee shop for awhile and went home.
bathed and sleep straight away.
was such a pig.
p was having stomach upset the whole night and vomitting away yet i didnt noe and sleep lyk a pig.
felt so bad for not taking care of him =/

2008-09-11T09:53:00.000-07:00

OKOK, MY BLOG IS SO DEAD!
CAN PPL PLEASE TAG?!

WORDY POST AHEAD.
BEWARE!

im so loving this hols(:
spending so much time wif p and im so happy! :D
met him on monday.
seen him on tues.
met him agn on wed.
met for dinner today! :D
wat else is better than seeing him everyday?
im so so so happy wif life right now :D
i dun wan the hols to end pls.

WEDNESDAY
went over to meet p early in the morning for breakfast.
then slack at his hse.
he forever sleeping. =/
then i'll sleep oso.
hahahahha.
then wake up play com games.
we played this wacky wheels.
and i keep on losing lah.
not fun at all.
hahaha. *im a sore loser* =p
then i had to leave for work.
sob sob. :(

late for work heck care eat dinner first then start.
got this new full timer.
he got those kind of qian da face =x
he talk quite guai lan leh.
dun lyk him sia.
stand dere lyk statue liddat. wth.
i see him i buay song.
when he talk i keep on laughing.

reached home watched my qian nv you hun then met jouren for supper!
make him wait for me while i watch my show.
hahaha. damn mean i noe.
brought zayden down oso to see us eat. haha.
after dat chitchat for around 1 hr then go back.

THURSDAY
i was having flu and quite a swollen eyes so didnt go for trng.
plus back still hurts abit.
but much better after p gave me the deep heat thing to apply(:

at first wanna meet cousin for dinner.
but last min p say wanna meet so ask him to tag along.
but cousin feel weird so she ask me meet him instead =/
i wanna have dinner wif both of them lah. :(

then met p at vivo at 7.
supposedly at 630.
then he late so meet 7 instead.
and then i was late =/
decided wat to eat for a long time.
in the end ate at kopitiam.
p eats alot but doest grow fat!!!!
unfair lahhh.
he eats lyk much much more than me :(
except that i eat abit fo junk food here and dere.
hahahahah.
he eats $6 worth of hokkien mee.
and still can help me finish up abit of leftover fried fish beehoon!
pro!!!!

went to pet's safari to see puppy(:
dats wat we do everytime we at vivo.
hahaha.
i wanna get another shihtzu lah!
they so cuteeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!
somemore can keep my zayden company:D
anyone wanna buy for me pls? :D
the chow chow oso damn cute lah!
look lyk soft toy bear bear.
ultra cute pls! look so huggable :D

went to play arcade after dat.
first time playng wif p.
we played 3 times of racing and i won once! :D
then we played the basketball oso.
216. =/
my shooting getting lousier lah!
then play finish around 930.
p have to go home alr :(
so he sent me to bustop and pei me wait for bus(:

going sis's sch tml wif cousin to watch her performance for mid autumn fest(:
after dat mayb meeting p?
really hope can meet him.
hees! am damn happy(:
i love you(:

looking forward to sunday.
our 2mths anniversary! :D
<3<3<3

2008-09-09T03:07:00.001-07:00

FRIDAY

went to work and p came to stay over after my work(:
i really hate the stpid boss!!!!!!
my pay for last month only $258.30!!!
so little :(

SATURDAY

slacked wif p at home.
he played wif zayden(:
first time lah.
the 2 of them so funny(:
im glad that p is starting to lyk zayden?
he thinks zayden is too barky and smelly.
but zayden didnt bark at him on dat day!
miracle(:
p left at 3 plus?

then waked my sis up and we went tiong bahru ajisen for dinner! :D

sis's crayfish ramen, fried silver fish, fried tofu, some meat stick. haha.

sis likes craufish ramen! i ate seafood ramen. but forgot to take pics. haas. i think her ramen taste abit lyk chillicrab sauce being diluted. dats why i dun lyk. haas.

yayness!! and we finished everything!! :D yummy!

i treat sis ajisen so she treat me ice-cream! even though we werre both freaking full! haha.

went to work after dinner(:
came back from work and my back started to ache lyk crazy!
even had difficulties walking lah!
sleep was kinda tough too.

SUNDAY
breakfast wif sis at hse downstairs and went to work.
freaking bored at work lah.
wokr form 330 to 1130.
no life :(
back was still aching and the bloody chair has no back rest! :(

MONDAY
p was suppose to giv me morning cal at 9 to wake me up but he didnt!
and he's the one who said he'll call =/
so i woke up late.
prepare till 11 then i called him and he jus woke up!
cabbed over to his place and had breakfast.
his maid cook maggi mee for both of us. haas.
then played wif charcoal(his rabbit)
and we took an afternoon nap(:
woke up then hurry rush for movie in town.
i fell down on the way :(
and he was lyk so sweet, ran back home and got a bottle of water for me to wash my leg(:
he said he thought i'll cry lyk most girls but i didnt(:

cabbed to cine and saw ariza!!! :D

wanted to watch forgetting sarah marshall(m18)
didnt manage to get the tixs at first cause the person realise that im actually 17!!!
so we got the movie make it happen.
then i ask p go exchange tixs at lvl 6!
and tada! manage to change and i manage to sneak inside! :D
the show is quite nice.
quite funny but got abit of sexual content.

ate at the jap restaurant iin cine. forgot the name. haas.
my pork curry pasta sucks lah!
but p's tori karaage cream pasta was not bad.
had student meal and total bill was only $20.70!
quite affordable bah.

went over to workplace to play pool!
p had some beer (1 jug+1mug) plus my vodka!
p teaches me pool(:
then he played wif jimmy.
chatted too long and ended up it was quite late.
p missed the last train.
so after asking jimmy he finally allow us to stay over at his place cause he have 1 extra rm.

TUESDAY
slept till morning 10 plus then we left.
back was still aching lah!
so i walked wif a hunched back.
and p says i walk lyk liang popo! :(
WTH. WTH. WTH.
it gotten worse :(
mayb shall go see sinseh soon if it continues to hurt tml.
p says i pulled some muscles or smth.
and i had to sleep wif a bolster underneath my back if not the pain is really intolerable and i cant slp well :(
reached back home and continue to sleep till 530!
on and off lah. not deep sleep. haas.
i miss p terribly.
i wan more time wif him :(

2008-09-02T08:18:00.000-07:00

trng today wif jing, kesh and shihui in the afternoon.
school trng was cancelled at first .
planning to go watch F&P netball league.
then suddenly they say singapore not playing so resume trng!

finished trng then jing, kesh and me went amk hub for dessert.
me and kesh were so tempted to eat the sambal sotong lah!
and i ate this durian ice kacang!
i think its nice but kesh and jing says it taste weird =/

boo! i dropped my "essence"! (first photo)
i dropped most of the durian paste on the table :(
was so sad lahhh.
and yet that kesh and jing laugh lyk hell!

2008-09-01T09:51:00.000-07:00

i cant imagine how i pass my 5 days of attachment without meeting him!
the attachment was drivng me nuts!
and giving me high blood pressure!
shan't say more.

p, the time spent wif u was great.
i feel that we're getting closer.
are we?
hugs(:

we're together for

1 month and 18 days(:

longest ever in my whole history.

lets hope it last longer(:

2008-09-01T05:59:00.000-07:00

1)The person who tagged you is:
KESHIA! my grandaughter! :D

2)Your relationship with her is:
teammate, frens(:

3)Your 5 impression of her is:
crazy, mad, laugh alot, talk alot of crap, the kc girl!

4)The most memorable thing she has done for you:
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. call me ah ma when i wore this ultra high socks!

5)If she becomes your lover, you will:
have a shock of my life and die of heart attack! haha.

6)If she becomes your lover, things she will have to improve on will be:
ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

7)If she becomes your enemy, the reason would be:
being a bad grandaughter! ahha.

8)The most desired thing you want to do for her now is:
hope that her thumb will recover fully!

9)Your overall impression of her is:
crazy and fun loving.

10)How do you think people around you feel about you?
no idea.

11)The characteristics you love about yourself:
haaa. none really.

12)On the contrary,the characteristics you hate about yourself:
lazy and slack!!!!!!!!!!!!!

13)The most ideal person you want to be is:
be more cheerful and not so lazy.

14)The people that care and like you, say something to them:
thanks for all ur concern ppl! really appreciate that. you all are the best!! love you guys! :D

15)Pass this quiz on 5 people you wish to know to know more about you.
-kesh (ps do again for me lehh. haas)
-regina
-ariza
-jingyi
-shihui

2008-08-27T09:08:00.000-07:00

so u dun msg me its my fault?
im testing u?
i was waiting for u.
waiting for ur msg the whole freaking day!
after a bad day at work,
having a ultra bad cramp and
not a single word of comfort from u.

do u even care?
u did say u'll initiate to sms me.
so from monday to wed.
how many? 1!!!!!!!
only 1 single pathetic sms which totally make my day.
jus 1, it can change my day from bad to great.
thats the difference u make in my life.

u may initiate to chat wif me in msn lah.
but of it cant be compared together.
cause its a totally different thing from sms.

i dun wanna text u first cause i dun wanna sound so sticky to u.
i dun wanna disturb u.

u may think dat im sensitive or whatever.
but seriously, think about it.
which girl can accept this.
if i neva online today.
bet u wont text me the whole freaking day.

2008-08-22T22:42:00.000-07:00

i feel so stupid
and i feel so bad towards kesh, jac, jing, shihui.
they ask me to go sch and play netball on sat.
i promise them i'll go.
then when p say he can meet me on sat so i ps them. :(
he said meet me from 1-5.
then now? 1-2?
wats the point?

i hate myself for always giving in.
why cant for once i say no to him?
why can he jus go out wif his frens and ps me?
for him, im willing to giv up everything.
whereas him?
dun think so bah.
im jus a burden.
or something to kill time when he's bored.
dats wat i feel.

so tired from crying.
im a weakling.

2008-08-22T10:00:00.000-07:00

pretty fireworks! went out wif jess, aisya and gloria in the afternoon! caught money no enough 2!

quite nice. except some parts which are quite stupid. but overall storyline is good and touching! :D

as expected i cried lahhh. so touching lah. jess cried too. haha.

had dinner at pasta mania after movie!

wheee! long time since i last had it.

nice nice :D

wanted to go night safari at first but was quite late.

and xinni told me dere's fireworks so we decided to go.

it was suppose to start at 9?

but actual time dat it starts is aorund 930!

the whole fireworks last for 15 mins.

and its ultra pretty.

too bad p is not wif me :(

from left, gloria, jess, me, aisya

fyi, aisya and gloria are sitting on our laps!

gloria is lying down on our laps lah!!!

camwhore alot as u can see. haha. went home after we finish camwhoring!

reached home at 11 plus. had a great day wif the girls! :D

love you all lah.

cecillia was at dere too. but wif her other frens.

so she came over for some camwhoring session and left wif her frens. :D

2008-08-20T09:48:00.000-07:00

wow. my blog jumped about 40 hits today!
is dere really 40 ppl visiting or jus ppl refreshing for fun?
hahhahaha.
i wonder. but pls do tag i'll try to reply. :D
meeting p tml.
lyk finally.
havent seen him for 3 days alr.
miss him so much!

i dreamt that i was outside ur hse waiting for u
cause ur parents were at home.
and after i waited for quite a long time
you told me u have to go out wif them.
and then u tried finding an excuse not to go so as to accompany me.
but u failed and u cried cause
u felt bad for not being able to be here wif me.
how precious dat tear was.
i cried wif u in my dream and almost in reality.
cause i noe dat it would neva happen in real life.
i wake up from my dream getting all upset and frustrated.
cause its jus a dream and i have to wake up and go to work.
i miss you so much.
think of u so much.
i dun even noe how the hell i get myself into this state.
i have no idea.
i guess karma is working on me.

2008-08-19T07:47:00.000-07:00

MICHELLE

nice blog that i chanced upon while blog hopping.
a teenage mommy and coping well.
so touched by her stories.
i think she's damn brave lah.
and makes me feel lyk having a baby too.
awwwwwwww.
pls help by clicking on her nuffnang ads.
so dat she can earn money from it.
jus a click so no harm rite(:
thanks alot! :D

2008-08-18T10:21:00.000-07:00

l shall summarise my interesting weekend(:

FRIDAY
friday night, p came to stay over after his drinking session.
he is such a pig.
straight away fell asleep after bathing =/

SATURDAY
sat night, jouren came to fetch me after his work :D
so honoured, im the first girl to ride his bike sia.
hahahahhaa.
im seriously quite scared.
cause first time i get a ride from someone other than my dad.
went cousin's pub to drink.
then when closed, jouren send me home.
even scarier. cause he abit high alr. =/
we drink 1 more bottle at my hse here de coffee shop then home.
it was lyk 4 plus alr =/

SUNDAY
morning went out wif jac to view his new puppy!
a shetland sheepdog!

met p in the evening for shopping at vivo(:
he was late for half hr! =/
he accompanied me get my stuff and then we had dinner at sarawak noodles.
after eating slacked at the sky park.
pretty scenery!
and we managed to saw a little fireworks coming from sentosa! :D
it was a very low fireworks but am still quite happy :D
home-ed around 10.

i finally get my slippers after saying for dunno how long! :D
pretty right. so colourful. haha.

got my eyeliner from missha oso.
the lipgloss is damn ugly on my lips! :(

finally, a nice picture of zayden sleeping stomach up!
he's enjoying himself obviously. haha.

2008-08-14T09:35:00.000-07:00

very nice song. although it is some time ago. this song is so true and so very nice.

p came over after his attachment. slack for awhile and goes to town.
caught meet dave at ps. had a very rushed dinner cause we were rushing for movie.
had pasta in this restaurant call the indulge at the cathay.
quite nice(: like the spices(:
everything done in lyk half hr!
the movie is nice.
quite hilarious.
should go watch.
i rank it 4/5! :D

2008-08-09T01:44:00.000-07:00

ytd only work for 2 hrs.
cause not much customer.
so when boss left, sing karaoke! :D
havoc.and make some cocktails to try :D
tried making my own version of sex on the beach and it failed terribly =/
was suppose to put cranberry juice but i added fruit punch by mistake =/
then jouren make for me tequila sunrise.
i oso dun think its nice. haas. think the best is still vodka sprite.

waited for cousin and jouren, jimmy to finish work then headed down to cousin's pub at cantonment there.
saw efa! :)
cousin treat me a jug of beer(:
drink a few glass of beer and i was abit high.
haas.
then cousin send me to bq to find my fren.

i love night life.

2008-08-09T01:17:00.000-07:00

hais. fuck. its officially over.
so much for looking forward to this sat date.
and my long awaited dream of watching fireworks wif bf.
it will never be again.

the first time it hurts so much.
tears cant help but flow.
its lyk i have unlimited supply of tears.
i can cry anytime anywhere.

i did so much, sacrificed so much for him.
but he never gets it.
he never appreciates it.
i cant live in this self denial anymore.
telling myself that he loves me but only has no time for me.
cause its not true.

2008-08-08T21:55:00.000-07:00

went sentosa wif p on monday! :D
finally get to suntan!
met p at vivo and took monorail in.

went palawan beach. cause i dun wanna queeze wif ppl in siloso.
then p started saying dat siloso got no pretty girls and handsome guys! -.-

tan for around 1 hour plus then we left.
went vivo for lunch.
had asian kitchen.
p says its not as nice as wat i claim it to be =/
then went his house for mahjong wif his classmates(:
they are all nice ppl! :D

that's charcoal(: p's rabbit!

we play from 4 pm till next day 8am!!!
ordered canadian pizza for dinner on monday.
and most of us got a bad stomachache the next day! =/

slept at his house after mahjong.
then evening time went to cathay for dinner!
and we had desserts after dat.
ben and jerry!!! :D yummy!!! :D

2008-08-05T10:04:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ONCE AGAIN DEAREST! :D

as i was randomly browsing through blogs i came upon colleen's blog.

she and her bf is so sweet!

really jealous lah.

and at the same time, wish her all the best(:

im here at 0107 blogging and there's a freaking sociology test tml which i havent finish studying =l

i should be a good girl lyk bf and mug hard.

but i jus cant seem to find the motivation to do dat :(

i thought poly life would be much easier and relax than sec sch but it is the exact opposite!

i jus wish to spend everyday wif bf and slack my whole life away.

cant wait for this week to end and celebrate bf's birthday(:

hope he's not meeting his fren this weekend so he can meet me.

i wanna spend 1 whole day wif him which i havent done so in dunno how many 214345545 days?!

okay, im exaggerating. but thats how i feel.

i miss bf!

2008-08-04T11:05:00.000-07:00

the chocolate cake(:

the icing(:

HAPPY 23RD BIRTHDAY DEAREST(:
you're so old alr!
haha. hope you like the 'surprise' i gave you(:

first time i did so much for someone.
went ester house to borrow oven to bake cake!
her parents are ultra friendly! :D
her mother help me alot!
thanks aunty! :D (if she ever sees this)

anw, i troubled ester alot.
keep on asking her to go down wif me to buy ingredients!
haha. firstly i forgot the box then i forgot the milk -.-

so after baking slack at her hse till 11 plus then left for p's hse to surprise him(:

waited half hr outside his hse till 12 am then called him to come out and collect his present(:
thought we could have lyk spend a little time together to eat the cake and all.
but his house gate was lock! idiotic :(
was kinda disappointed.
cabbed back home after dat.

hope dar had a wonderful and memorable birthday(:
*ily

2008-08-02T10:15:00.000-07:00

i miss p alot alot :(
didnt see him for 3 days and it feel so freaky long!
but luckily i'll get to see him tml(:
cant wait(:

p's been ultra mean lately!
he says im fat :(
seriously need to lose some weight :(

baby, i dunno whether u'll read this.
but i hope you'll put in more effort.
i noe its a busy and stressful time for you now
and im trying my best to accomodate you.
so please, show me more love and give me more attention?
*ily

baby'sbirthday is on the 5th!
but stupid school ends at 5! :(

2008-07-28T08:52:00.001-07:00

fucking depressed and demoralised :(
shouldnt have went for training today since shihui wasnt gg.
knew coach is gonna train the main players for pesta.
so wat for i go.
felt like the only one being left out and neglected :(
starting of training was alright.
until she make us do half court.
i wasnt put into play at all for around an hr.
she only ask me stand at the back to be lyk the "defender"
but in actual fact, i dun have to do anything.
she's jus trying to make it less obvious that she's heck-caring me.
lyk whatever lah! fuck!
feel lyk quitting. cause there's no future being in nyp netball.
hais. tell me what should i do?

i need someone to talk to now.
was so loking forward to talking to p on the phone and pour out all my sorrows to him.
but when i called he didnt pick up.
think he's asleep :(
hais.life is bad when im not wif him :(
even him oso ask me to quit netball. hais.

got 3 papers next week and i have nt started studying at all.
fuck. so gonna suffer from depression soon.

2008-07-27T03:42:00.000-07:00

pooor bear bear. zayden's toy. haha. he was playing tug-o-war wif sis den the leg came off!
so rough lah both of them. haiyo!

century egg porridge(:

deserts! mango pudding is loved<3>

shark fins soup(:

fried durian! :D today wasnt dat nice. not sweet enough.

dim sum! prawn dumpling, siew mai, pork ribs(:

favourite of the day! paper wrapped sotong! yummy! we had 3 plates of it :D

had beijing duck, paper wrap chicken and xiaolongbao! :D but still prefer crystal jade de(:

we ate alot for 3 persons! $120++! OMG. FAT! :(

went sim lim square to get pay for IT fair after dat. yay! $340! :D

gotta study soon cause exam

im so looking forward to end of exams and september hols! :D

then p will have more time for me(:

2008-07-24T08:34:00.000-07:00

trng was quite fun before the coach comes.

i tied keshia's hair for her(:

so chio lor. haha!

the above pic is the prove :D

anw, as expected i didnt get into the team for pesta.

but nvm, i'll train harder for the coming polite games.

alll the juniors should train harder so dat we all get in!

thanks jess for lending me your shoulder(:
yongjun for providing me the sad songs(:
gloria and huishan for the chocs(:
ash, amanda and keshia for cheering me up(:

i jus think my life totally sucks.
nothing is gg my way.
r/s wif p is so unstable.
he doesnt even have time for me now.
all he does is study and study :(
i noe i should be understanding but its really too much.
sometimes not even a sms from him.
do u have any idea how sad i was?
how depressed and emo i was?
2 days without seeing u feels lyk months and years for me :(

i miss you so badly :(

2008-07-20T08:52:00.000-07:00

its a sunday. and guess wat time i woke up?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
7AM!!!!!

miracle right(:
met jess at serangoon mrt and went braddell heights cc.
watched p kick soccer! :D
it was some street soccer competition.
the match time is damn weird.
first match 1010. then 2nd one is lyk 12 plus?!

p was great even though they didnt win(:
i so love watching him play even though im not a very soccer person.
i dun even noe the basci rules.
hahahahhahaha.

went to play pool wif p and his group of soccer frens at toapayoh.
they are such a funny bunch of ppl!
had a great laugh(:
p is good in pool! :D
i shall learn and get better cause i seriously suck in it.
play until around 6 then we all split up.
me and p went for dinner at koufu then he accompany me take train till dhoby ghaut(:

my back is sunburnt!!!! then got the shirt tanline =/
and and and i think jess gonna love me so damn much! :D
cause i was such a nice fren! :D
hahahahahhahaa. right jess? (:
oh and p is coming back school tml! :D
no more attachment! :D
which means, i may see him in school more often? (hope so)
since we're both in shs i hope i bump into him more often(:

2008-07-17T20:01:00.000-07:00

had a terible nightmare.
which woke me up crying.
i dreamt that daddy dun wan us anymore ='(
and the feeling is just so real and it hurt so much.

i use to have this kind of dreams when i was younger.
mayb cause that time i was trying to get use to my parents divorce.
but why am i having it again now?

i guess my insecurities is surfacing again =(
how i wish p is here to wipe away my tears and hug me tight :(

2008-07-15T06:48:00.000-07:00

training on monday!
damn hilarious! :D
training is so fun now.
after getting to know them better(:
audrey has chalks so we drew on the court(:
so cute lah! :D

selection on monday for pesta sukan carnival!
hope i can get in =x
but i doubt so, we got so many strong shooters!

p waitied a long time for me on tues!
sorry sweet!
p came over and slack and we had dinner together(:
time seems to pass so fast whenever im wif him :(

2008-07-13T10:08:00.000-07:00

i jus so love spending time with him(:
sweet(:

watched 10 promises to my dog!
ultra nice! go watch! :D
jus make me fall deeper in love wif my zayden! :D
cant imagine wat if 1 day zayden were to leave me :(
i'll be so bloody sad lah :(
cried a river and p wipe it for me and gave me hugs(:

have been spending the past 5 days wif p and i really treasure the time together(:
stayed out wif p to drink on fri after work.
then slack the whole day on sat and went town to collect my phone! :D
p walk me to far east then i took bus to work(:
work is jus so freaking boring lah. :(
rather spend time wif p =P

went out wif p to vivo jus now.
saw this really cute puppy chowchow!
look lyk teddy bear lah!
so ultra cute! :D
window shop and we had sarawak noodle.
quite nice(: good recommendation from p(:
then slack at sky park.
jus love spending time wif p.
even though we're doing nothing(:

i really hope we can stable down alright.
i miss u lyk crazy :(
cant wait for next week to come so i can see u in sch! :D

i have not study for my bio sci test tml!
im alr prepared to flunk :(
i know nth at all lahhhh :(

2008-07-10T08:07:00.000-07:00

HAPPY 1ST BIRTHDAY ZAYDEN!!

MUMMY LOVE YOU LOTS(:

thank you for all the time u spent wif us.

all the laughter and the joy. :D

your cute action neva fail to put a smile on my face.

and your love for me have neva faded.

mummy may have little time for u.

but u should noe mummy loves u lots(:

more than anything on earth.

love you baby, cutie boy, darling, fat fat boy! :D

2008-07-03T07:53:00.000-07:00

OMG! MY PHONE SPOIL!!
the screen is totally cannot see anything de lor!
so sad. have to send for repair!
damn lazy lehhh.
oso cannot upload pictures into my com!

AND AND, SIS GONNA BE BACK FROM OBS TML!
dad said the teachers called saying that she fell down and i think they send her to hosp or something =/
think she's alright bah if nt she will be home by now.

somehow i feel dat its a wrong choice once again.
i dun feel the love and security.
hmmm. tell me wat to do!

2008-06-22T06:17:00.000-07:00

time really makes a fool of ppl.
if only we went out sooner.
if only we met earlier.
mayb then, things will change.
mayb, i'll be the your gf then.
but no, time is wrong.
u alr got a gf and u love her lots.

everytime i took a bus and it pass by that bustop,
i think of u.
i think of the time when we were at the bustop and u block me from the rain.
it was nth much but it touched my heart deeply.
it was such a sweet little gesture that i cant help but smile.

everytime i stand on the escalator,
i think of u.
the time when u hold my skirt for me and hug me tight.
to protect me from zaogeng.

but when i see you online now,
i feel a hurt in me.
cause ur nick is all about her.
im so jealous of her.
if only i can her.
i wanna wait but i dun think its worth it.
cause in ur eyes u will neva see me.

so from now on,
i will stop thinking of u.
and my heart will stop aching for u.
stop looking at ur profile and see those sweet comments she wrote for u,
i willl move on.
and not let history repeat itself.

the hurt was deep.
and yet i didnt shed a single tear.
guess im really getting immune to r/s.
i need help!

2008-06-17T06:17:00.000-07:00

regina and me! at MOS toilet!

sheeny and me! :D

we must admit that we super ultra love MOS toilet! :D because it is huge, lots of cubicles and most importantly lots of MIRRORS!!! :D

this is the most suay bdae ever! fancy falling sick the day before wif a high fever, and had to rest at home the whole day on actual bdae! :(
slept my whole day away lahhhh.

jus woke up around 7 plus then sinyee, sharry and danny ang was outside my house! gave me a surprise(: the cake was super nice! :D chatted wif them for awhile then went sinyee hse which was jus next block to mine. :D

after that went home to prepare and down to MOS to meet regina and sheeny! waited a long time for cab lah!!! somemore got angmoh snatch cab wif me! hmpf! it was damn creepy.
cause i was standing near to traffic light then got alot of those male drivers drive super slow and tun their head to look at me lah! got 2 of them even whistle! OMG OMG OMG. DIRTY OLD UNCLES!

reach and albert was dere too! wif a slice of cake! ahha. so they sang me bdae song and all and they headed in to club! :D MOS is quite big lah. the sound system is good! but abit too good until i feel deaf when i left the club. haas. the music is quite good. at least its rnb the whole night and not mix those trance! somethings happen inside the club and i dn wanna elaborate lah. quite irritated oso. so ya. wait for my next update which will be in 1732645713yrs time! till then! byebye! :D

2008-06-17T03:01:00.000-07:00

love letter from sinyee! thanks babe! so touched(:

hongbao and letters from 8 frens! thanks peeps! :D
bodyshop perfume from regina and sheeny! :D

birthday present from phillip! thanks! :D

the pretty roses(:

a big thanks to everyone who makes my birthday so memorable :D

2008-06-15T03:04:00.000-07:00

it was lotsa fun working in the IT fair at suntec! get to know lots of great ppl and my PL! :D

although the pay is really pathetic. haas. for the 4 days i only sold a total of 15 laptops! :(

our booth were at a damn isolated corner so no customer. :(

so me and honey(her real name!) started zilian and use the webcam to take photos! :D

so fun lor! both of us were lyk crazy woman keep on laughing! haha.

i miss all the them! and the time spent wif them! i wanna work wif them again!

2008-06-08T22:07:00.000-07:00

birthday is coming!!
in 8 days!!!
17/06/91
shall list out what i wan for birthday! haha!
dun think much ppl will remember anw =/

-GUESS transparent golden lining medium size bag!
its on sales now! $75.90!
-or the big one, $85.90
-black plain tube/halter dress from manggis!
$37.90
-NF black shorts size 30
$29.90 or $20 from blogshops!
-Anna sui dolly girl perfume (pink one)
$49(75ml) from lucky plaza
-i accept hongbao also! hahahaha! the best is hongbao lah cause i can go get wat i want! :D

hahahahah! i think im abit thick skin asking ppl to buy =P
this is jus for reference in case u wanna get anything for me. haha!
and anw, most probably i'll be gg MOS on my bdae as there is an underage event there! :D

2008-06-08T21:14:00.000-07:00

me, sis and wanzhen after sis concert!

my beatles sister! haha. inside joke! :D

she is so love by her frens lah! got so many rose! im jealous!

anw, the concert is not bad. jus dat i realise i really dunno how to appreciate music! haas. went to have supper wif wanzhen after the concert. the concert end freaking early. at around 8 plus. went raffles place wif cousin and we drank soup at soup spoon! i love the tomato asil soup! so nice(: the clam chowder soup sucks lah!

mus before! beware! the following pictures may make u feel uncomfortable! haha.

he can make a hump on his back! eery!!!

the main character! haha.
studied in the school lib till 9 on thurs wif mus, huishan, jasmine. huishan left earlier. we waited for the kayakers(amanda & jiahao) to finish their trng then walk to mrt station together.

for those of u who didnt noe, we broke up alr. so dun tag piggy or whatsoever alr ok? thanks! :D